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Message #:1900
Time to look for the author...*** "Post-Naked Counseling" JDL |
"Post-Naked Counseling"
JDL: Nurse (Lt.) Moore and Counselor (Ensign) Nguyen
Ensign Dane Nguyen, the Eagle's counselor, sat in sickbay. It was almost zero two-hundered hours, and he was quite tired, but he also knew that once he tried to lay down, he would only be thinking of what had, almost, happened aboard that moon/base. He looked over to Lt. Amelia Moore, whom had also been abducted and as much a victim as he had been. She had not looked directly at him, once, since he had arrived in the medical ward.
Lt. Amelia Moore fiddled with the medical console, finding something to at least pretend she needed to look at to avoid looking at the Counselor. After what had happened she was hoping to have avoided contact with either him or the Captain.
""Amelia," Nguyen said softly. "I'm pretty sure I know what you are going through. I was totally ready to go all the way with both you and the captain. I almost broke down in tears when he broke away from us."
Amelia nodded slightly. "I knew it was wrong, But... I wanted to... " She shut her eyes tight to keep the tears at bay, "... wanted both of you. I felt like something was ripped away when..." She swallowed hard and shook her head, "I could not stop, I just couldn't. I'm a horrible person!"
"Horrible?" the counselor asked. "Why do you feel that way? I feel ashamed for my weakness, but certainly not that I am a horrible person."
"He's married!" Amelia said, her voice wavering as she fought the tears, "I knew that and I still wanted him to, you know. How could I not think less of myself when I didn't care about that!"
Dane cocked his head. "Married? Captain McCloud? No, he is single. I think he might have a thing for the CMO of Pasteur Station, but he isn't married."
Amelia shook her head, "Well, attached to someone then. But I didn't care about anything other than... " She finally looked up at the counselor, tears shimmering in her eyes, "I didn't care about you either. About what you wanted. I can't forgive myself for that!"
"Let me ask you this," Nguyen said gently, "before you were taken from the ship, and even after you had spent all that time, before I showed up, did you have that desire?"
"What? No!" Amelia's face turned red, "I mean I like the Captain, but... I didn't... like... want him. And not that you aren't nice, but I never thought of either of you in that way"
"You don't have to worry about me," Dane said to her. "I'm gay, which really makes my actions toward you a mystery." He offered an embarrassed smile.
Amelia allowed herself a small smile. "I sorta figured that out. I am sure there are a few heartbroken females around. But, I just can't even wrap my own mind about the fact that I was ready to let both you and the Captain... to have... to... umm, engage in intimate pastimes."
"It was a surrprise to me, as well, Amelia," Nguyen admitted. "I wanted to give myself to both of you." He nodded at her ending comment. "Yeah. I definitely get that. But, we have to remember, that wasn't us. In fact, when I first arrived, you and the captain were simply talking. That was you. That was the captain, and thenthey had to go and introduce something to change our behavior."
Amelia shook her head, "I don't think I will ever be able to face him again. I just am too ashamed of how I acted. I don't know if it was whatever they put in the air or if it was ... me!" She buried her face in her hands again as she tried to regain control of her emotions.
Dane, again, slowly nodded. "I wonder, myself, how I am going to ever perform bridge duty, again," he admitted. "But, whether it was you or the influencing of our captors, I'm sure it was the latter. The mortified look, you had, when I first arrived, told me that, Amelia."
She lifted her head and looked at the counselor, "I'm not, well I wasn't, I mean that I don't , ugh... I was not comfortable being naked like that around men I don't really know, or anyone else for that matter. I don't do that sort of thing!"
"Exactly," Nguyen said softly. "And I certainly would not have an affair with my commanding officer... Well, not right away, anyhow." He gave her a sheepish grin.
Amelia smiled a little. "Well, yeah, unless you already had something going." She sighed and flopped back in her seat, "I can't even let myself think about it now, I just wish I could wipe it all from my mind. Well most of it anyway. But every time I try not to remember it only seems to make it harder to forget every moment."
"How do you suppose Captain McCloud feels?" Nguyen asked. "I mean, he is our commanding officer. I know there are captains who think nothing of having flings with members of their crew, but Captain McCloud is just not one of those types."
"I imagine he's a bit pissed at what happened, " Amelia said quietly, "But at least he had the integrity and the willpower to keep it from going too far. I keep thinking about what might have happened if we hadn't been rescued right then. Would we have been able to keep resisting much longer? I know I wasn't too good at that to start with."
Dane stared off to the opposite side of sickbay, not really looking at anything in particular. In his mind, he could vividly recall every detail "Honestly," he said after a long pause, "I don't think I wanted to resist. It had beenquite a while since I had any intimate contact, like that. I... wanted it to happen." He looked down at his feet.
Amelia reached out her hand to touch his arm, but pulled back, unsure of, if even that small contact would be difficult to endure for either of them. She folded her hands into her lap and looked down at them as she spoke. "At least you've had those kinds of contact before," She finally said, her voice barely audible even to her own ears.
Dane quickly turned his head toward her. He tried, unsuccessfully to keep the surprise out of his voice. "You've never done... had intimate contact before?"
Amelia shook her head, "I know. Unheard of in this day and age, right?" She lifted her head slowly but stared at the console in front of her, "No one ever seemed to be that attracted to me. And I spent most of my time studying alone, so, no I've never. "
"Yeah," Dane said, regaining his composure. "Not real common, these days, but, also not unheard of. It does bring a valid explanation to your reaction when I first arrived, and your obvious discomfort. Also, I do apologize for my unprofessional reaction, just then."
She shrugged her shoulders a little, "It's okay. At least I sort of got a little, umm, taste of what it could be like. But even that seems like it is wrong to feel that way on so many levels."
"Only because we were forced, yes forced, to do that," Nguyen assured her. "Believe me, under the right circumstance... Whew! It is wonderful." He offered another embarrassed smile.
Amelia frowned, "Well, the way my life is going, there will never be a right circumstance. And honestly, Even if it was forced, I don't know how you can even stand to be in the same room with me after what I did to you."
"I understand why you feel that way, and I am not going to say you are wrong," Dane said to her. "But, I will tell you this... You didn't do anything to me that I didn't want done. Captain McCloud... " He blushed, again, as he thought of those final moments before they found they were on the holodeck. "... didn't do anything I didn't want to have happen."
Amelia sighed, "that may be true to some extent, but you would not normally have wanted that, especially from me, would you? And that's why I feel so ... " She huffed a little trying to figure out the words, "I can't even explain it coherently!"
"No," Nguyen answered honestly. "I would not have, but then again, under normal circumstances you would not have done that, would you?"
She shook her head. "Under normal circumstances, No, I would most definitely not. " She turned to face him again, "Why do I feel so, I don't know, I guess conflicted is the right term. I liked it, but I didn't want to like it then, does that make any sense?"
"It makes perfect sense," the counselor assured her. "It goes to show the actual caliber of a person, that you are." He offered another sheepish smile. "Where does that leave me when I just plain say that I liked it?" His sheepish smile turned a bit more mischievous."
Amelia raised her eyebrows, "apparently more comfortable with sex than I am?"
Dane broke out in laughter. "Maybe too much so."
Amelia couldn't help but smile. "I've heard that isn't such a bad thing. In fact someone once told me that it could be... Whew!" She gave Dane a wink, finally feeling like maybe it wasn't really so bad what happened, just a little awkward for all of them.
Dane gave her a knowing smile. "Oh, believe me, it can be all that and the peanut butter, too."
Amelia chuckled at that phrase, "I am not even going to ask if jelly is involved!" Her face got a little serious again, "You know, I think what bothers me the most is that three men I respect saw me naked and lord knows how many of those bastard were watching. And I still have to return the Commander's jacket at some point."
"Hey! They saw me naked, too. You think I wanted that... Okay, maybe a little." He offered her another mischievous smile, then he took on a more serious look. "All kidding aside, amelia, I hear you, and I definitely get why you feel that way. While we are a lot more... Open with our sexuality, and yes, nudity, it is still a vulnerable position for someone to be put in, especially when one is rather new to the people around them. But, let me tell you this... Up until the point they enhanced their game, you handled yourself admirably."
Amelia blushed at the compliment. "That had a lot to do with how Rayne, I mean Captain McCloud made me feel unthreatened. But thank you." She smiled a little mischievously herself, "and if I may make an observation without getting into trouble, you do look good out of uniform."
"Why, thank you, Nurse Moore," Nguyen replied, a little blush rising inhis cheeks. "And, I may be gay, but that doesn't mean I cannot appreciate a beautiful body, which I certainly saw... " He smiled,the twinkle of mischief in his eyes. '... Oh, and you looked quite good yourself."
Amelia giggled a little, "Yes the Captain does have quite the physique, doesn't he? And thanks."
Dane nodded. "mm-hmm. He sure does, and I would be lying if I said I hadn't imagined a scenario like that, a time or two, since I came aboard this ship. It was just he and I though... no women." He turned and smiled, again.
Amelia laughed. "so sorry to have ruined your fantasy evening. If I am honest, I could never have imagined anything like that before, but now... my imagination has something to work with and seems to be making up for lost time."
"Well, if you ever need any tips, or tools, to deal with that imagination, come see me," he offered.
Amelia blushed a deep red, "I couldn't, I mean.. that's not okay to imagine stuff like that, is it?"
"Well, I sure hope it is," Dane responded with a laugh. "The stars know I have a good imagination. But, that is me."
Amelia smiled a little, "but then you have some experience to support your imagination, all I have is a memory I shouldn't that still left me wondering about it all, except that maybe a certain someone can kiss good enough to knock your socks off. Oh Wait, I wasn't wearing any socks!"
"Dane nodded. "Yes, there is that. Which means we have to get you hooked up there, Girl." He gave her a wink.
Amelia's mouth dropped open in shock and she sputterred a bit, "I... that's... wait..." She shook her head, "I can't believe you just said that! What are you, the ships 'Yenta' or something?"
Dane laughed heartily. After a moment, he calmed and said, "I don't know what that is, but the look on your face was... priceless."
Amelia feigned being hurt for a moment but ended up laughing, "I bet it was, and "yenta" was the name of the matchmaker in a very old musical video called 'Fiddler on the roof'. And I am not sure that I need to get... hooked just yet."
Dane laughed along with her. Once his laughter had subsided, he said, "Matchmaker, eh? No, I don't think that is me. And getting 'hooked up' can happen, even on the holodeck. They have programs to help... alleviate tensions from being on these long space missions."
Amelia's face grew red in embarrassment. "I wouldn't feel comfortable with that sort of thing. Maybe some day but... " She shrugged her shoulders slightly, "I think waiting for the right person would be better than creating some holographic boyfriend. If I ever get to that point I think I would need to see you on a more, umm, professional level."
"I hear you," Nguyen told her. "How about this... Why don't I take you clubbing, some night. Just to get a feel for... well, a certain atmosphere. The club scenes are actually pretty popular holo-programs. You might even meet someone else from the ship."
"Clubbing? Well, I guess I could do that," Amelia replied uncertainly, "But I am sure that it won't amount to anything. "
"Don't be so certain, Negative Nelly," Nguyen said, mischief in his voice and eyes. "But, getting you to agree to go is half the battle."
She rolled her eyes. "You are incorrigible, do you know that?"
"I try," Dane said, trying to keep his face serious, but again, failing.
Just then, Dr. Resork appeared on the floor. The EMH looked at the two in surprise. "Amelia? Dane? It is quite a bit late. Are you alright?"
Amelia looked over at Resork and nodded, "We were just talking. I didn't realize it was so late."
"Well, it seems Captain McCloud has finished with the Elurions," Resork said. "We hae left orbit, and they did not attempt to stop us. They, up there, believe it was a combination of us figuring out how to stop them from stealing our crew, and the fact we, just plain, snuck up on them and rescued you all."
"That is good," Nguyen said,rising. "It definitely feels like bed time, though I am wondering just how much sleep I will get." He gave a look to Amelia and a wink. "There is a lot to sort through. And, Amelia, consider my offer."
Amelia shook her head in amusement. "We'll see Counselor! And hopefully you'll have a good night." She replied with a slight smirk.
"You, as well," Nguyen replied softly. "If you need to talk, any more tonight, no matter the time, give me a call."
She smiled, "Thanks. I think I'll be alright. And I still need to find Commander Hart to return his Jacket."
"You can probably put it in the reclaimer," Resork said. "Commander Hart was on the bridge and had a full uniform on, including his combadge."
Amelia raised her eyebrows. "I could, but I want to thank him. And if he wants to throw it in the reclaimer, that would be his choice."
"You have such a wonderful heart, Amelia," Dane commented. "And, with that, I shall bid you, both, a good night."
"Good night, Dane," She said with a smile as she stood and grabbed the Jacket. "And I'll try to find Hart."
"Good night, Dane," the EMH echoed. He looked to his nurse. "Why don't you let that go until a more decent hour. And, if you think you might have trouble sleeping, I might have just the thing to help you do just that."
She smiled at the good doctor. "I appreciate the offer, Dr. Resork. Maybe I will wait for a better time to give this back. If I find myself needing something to sleep I'll contact you."
Resork nodded. "I was going to go one step further, and offer you a bed, here in sickbay, but I shall leave you to your own. the offer is there, Amelia."
She nodded. "I think I would sleep better in my own bed. But thanks."
"You're quite welcome," Resork acknowledged. He then took on a mock-stern look. "Now, get on out of here. that is an order." He couldn't help but offer a small smile.
Amelia chuckled. "Yes, Sir!" She gave him a mock salute and turned to go, "And have yourself a good night as well."
###
